OK, my kids don’t really run the house, but I wasn’t sure how to title this post. 😉 When you’re a parent, you have to decide what’s most important to you, and let some other things slide. When we had a second child, then a third, I felt like I had to pick & choose a little more. When you have a child with special needs and/or suffer from anxiety and depression, it can sometimes feel like a battle to get through the days, and hope you don’t screw your kids up.
When my daughter was 18 months old, my father-in-law suggested that we hurry to have another child so we can get the diaper years “over with.” Their boys were 19 months apart (not on purpose) and that worked for them. I’d always hoped for 2.5 years or so between children but since my first was very high needs and has some special needs, we weren’t sure we were ready for another any sooner. I’d heard so many people say they had trouble conceiving their first & then – oops – surprise! We didn’t want that to happen to us, so we waited until we were really ready for another, to even try.
So, what is the perfect age gap? Is it easier to have more time between them? Have them in rapid succession and “get it over with?” Spoiler alert: there’s no perfect age gap between children. It depends as much on your child’s personality, your own, and your support system as it does on the months or years between them.
OK not so much a time machine as a time speeder upper. Having children seems to turn your life clock into a ceiling fan. Yet simultaneously, time creeps at a snail’s pace.