So, I’m trying something new by writing some personal stuff. We’ll see how it goes. If no one reads/comments, or if comments are mean, I might change my mind! I figured Wednesday would be a good day for it; What’s on my Mind Wednesday or what have you. 🙂
Now, I am normally totally non-confrontational and take a “kill ’em with kindness” approach. However, that pregnancy “glow” you see is actually rage simmering under the surface of my skin. I just don’t do pregnancy well and I’m surprised my husband puts up with me, LOL.
When I’m driving, I stay in the right lane with my cruise control on for the most part. I stay out of people’s way and just shake my head when the person who nearly ran me down ends up beside me at a stoplight 10 minutes later. I’m always telling my husband not to get worked up about traffic or idiot drivers because all it will do is raise his blood pressure and send him to an early grave!
Yet, when pregnant, I find myself thinking “OMG! I’m braking…up…hill. Go already! EAUUUGGHHH!” People who can’t pick a speed and mess up my cruise control/gas mileage make me want to tear my hair out. When someone backed out of a parking spot without looking and nearly hit us, I wanted to go beat on the hood of their car and ask them if they were blind or just stupid.
At the grocery store, I will wait patiently for someone to move out of the way, saying “excuse me” and/or pretending to look at my shopping list until they are finished. While pregnant, I imagine ramming them in the ankles with my cart and telling them that all the (corn, tuna, pasta) is the same so just pick one already!!
A few weeks ago, I took the kids to Chick-Fil-A for lunch. My son always wants to be held when it’s inconvenient, so I was holding him while I struggled to pull out a stack of high chairs, get one off the top, then put the stack away. I turned around for maybe 10 seconds to walk 8 feet to the counter (to get our food) and back, and someone had taken the *^%^& high chair! Normally, I’d give them the benefit of the doubt, but they had to have seen me struggling with the thing. I shot mental daggers into the backs of their heads and then wrestled another high chair out so we could sit down.
After we ate, I let the kids play in the playground a bit. This was a different restaurant than we usually go to. Our usual Chick-Fil-A has a little area for toddlers with a plastic tree house thing with slide etc. This one didn’t. All it had was what almost looked like a plastic box with a round opening (just big enough for one kid to climb through and sit in.) My son (two, and tiny) was halfway through it when a boy a few years older came into the play area. He immediately shoved himself into the “box,” knocking my son down in the process.
I brushed him off, and he went with my daughter to climb the bigger play tower. He is really a little too small for it, but can climb up with his sister’s help. The other boy came tearing out of the “box,” shoving my kids aside. When he made it through, he proceeded to climb up the slide while other kids were trying to go down. My kids were still trying to make it up (staying to one side because they’re polite like that) and the darn kid came rip roaring through again, stepping on my son this time! Now this whole time, the boy’s mother was sitting there. At least two or three times she said “watch out for the little ones,” but hello? The kid isn’t listening. When your
brat monster terror child is repeatedly knocking down, stepping on and hurting other children, you need to do more than repeat yourself, since he’s great at ignoring you.
I would normally just quietly redirect my kids and leave, but that day, I stood there for a full 10 seconds daydreaming. I stared into space and imagined telling that Mom just what I thought of her kid and her parenting skills. My daydream may or may not have included a few 4 letter words. Daydreams like this usually end up with me in front of a judge pleading temporary insanity, so I took a different approach. The passive-aggressive approach. I told my kids (louder than necessary) that we were leaving and why. (He is just too little when other big kids were knocking him down and stepping on him.) Luckily neither of them protested since it wasn’t fun anymore.
Pregnancy also makes me weepy (and clumsy and forgetful, which often leads to more weepiness) and over the dumbest things.
When I was pregnant with my daughter, Burger King put mayo on my whopper and I didn’t realize it until I got home. There’s really no way to get the mayo totally off the burger, lettuce and bun and darn it, I really wanted that burger! So…I cried.
I went to Fridays for lunch because all I wanted was their black bean soup. The waitress was brand new and had no idea what I was talking about because they had discontinued it! I managed to leave (without eating) before I cried, and I actually ended up finding a copycat recipe online that was even better (and coincidentally, is my daughter’s-who I was pregnant with at the time-favorite food.)
The extent of my crazy is not limited to food (although that seems to be a common theme.) When I was pregnant with my son, we had sold our house, bought land, and were renting (from a person, but done through our real estate agents) while we built. Unbeknownst to us, the landlord wasn’t paying the mortgage, and hadn’t been for some time. It seems he was using the money we paid him to pay the mortgage on his 5,000 sqft house instead.
Anyhoo, when the real estate agent called to tell me that we would have to move out (and that we would have to start letting strangers in at all hours so they could try to sell the house at a short sale before the foreclosure) I freaked out. I’m not sure when the voice-raising ended and the crying began, but it wasn’t pretty. We’d had a horrible time finding a place with a lease term less than 1-year and now not only was I going to have to move again, but we were going to have to try to find someplace to live for maybe a month, maybe three months. We weren’t totally sure when the house would be done.
Thanks goodness, our friends let us live with them for three months so at least we weren’t homeless, but that was an adventure in itself for sure!
Unfortunately for me, postpartum hormones don’t treat me much better. When my daughter was two weeks old, a neighbor decided to snowblow around 11 P.M. I marched down the street in my pajamas to ask him if he’d lost his everloving mind. (I’m sure he thought I’d lost mine!) Shortly after that, I spilled my lemon extract while making cookies…cried. After that? Tried on my pre-pregnancy jeans & couldn’t get them over my knees. Yep, cried.
I think I should have lived in an era when women “in this delicate condition” were locked out of sight. I’m afraid one of these days I’m going to say what I’m thinking, and it won’t be pretty!
So, if you see me staring into space with a smirk on my face and a devilish glint in my eye, know that I’m probably mentally reaming out the guy who decided to discontinue the Tuscan Turkey sandwich at Quiznos.
The crying! The first 4 months of pregnancy and 2 months after delivery were the worst. Slightly sappy commercial on TV? Time to cry! Nauseous, hungry, and can’t find anything that sounds good? Cry! Have a serious case of mom brain and miss a Dr appointment? CRY!
I suppose I should be glad I wasn’t angry too, but crying for no reason is pretty embarrassing and led to more crying. *sigh* I’m not completely over the crying, but it’s better than it was and my horrible case of mom brain seems to be abating.
Pregnancy, a horrible trick played on women by mother nature.
Loved your writing! Sounds like me! I don’t belong anywhere near parking lots, phones, or people… Quarantine!!
[…] I was 8 weeks pregnant when we moved and I was full of the crazies (by my 3rd pregnancy I realized I shouldn’t be allowed in public while pregnant) but we hadn’t told anyone yet. I flipped out and screamed at an automated system when I had […]
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[…] dream during pregnancy. It’s so very common and so very normal (and probably attributed to the rapid influx of extra hormones). It would not, however, be okay to be stuck living in that bizarre […]
Seriously, love this. Love you. I felt like I was sitting here reading about myself. I was wildly insane while pregnant with both of my girls, and sometimes that feeling perks up again. I am so glad I’m not the only person who cried over food. That just made my day. I enjoy the same mental daggers hobby, as far as I’m concerned they asked for it (and just because I’m smiling at you does not mean I think you’re captain lovely standing CLEARLY in my way). I don’t know where you live, but really if I lived by you, you would highly enhance my life. lol. I’m glad to know I’m not alone! Great blog.
LOL!! Writing this was so therapeutic, knowing I wasn’t the only insane pregnant woman out there. 😉
OMG! I’m so glad I’m not alone, thanks for sharing! My daughter is 11 now and I never went thru any of this. But now, I’m pregnant with my 2nd daughter and I swear I’m a friggn crazy person! My stepson dropped his eggs on the floor and left it there (he’s 7)…I cried. My husband brought home my fav wheat bran cereal, but WITHOUT the strawberries…I cried. The burger king lady told me their milkshake machine was out of order…I yelled at her. And when this restaurant didn’t have a chicken Alfredo pasta dish OR raspberry iced tea, I complained and left without ordering. My husband is so patient with my craziness and so are our kids, I don’t know how they do it, lol ! After I have the baby and my hormones are back to normal, I owe them big time…them and the burger king lady, lol !
With 3 pregnancies under my belt, I owe a LOT of people apologies, ha ha!!
I have become sooooo sensitive to anger this pregnancy. I had mood swings with my last, but these are mood tsunamis!! I seriously get blindingly angry over the littlest things and then cry my eyes out because I didn’t mean to get so angry. I feel exhausted from my emotions after every day 🙁
Oh my gosh, Tsunami is the perfect description!!
Maria, this was an awesome post! I laughed several times. I actually “stumbled” upon it. I hope you’ve kept up with your personal posts cause you’ve got the knack.
Aww thanks Amy. Your comment made my crappy morning, LOL.
Thanks for this! This is so helpful. I am not alone!!!!!!
I totally relate — and was on hospital bedrest for 2 months of my pregnancy. Imagine hormones trapped in a hospital room!
Oh no! I CAN’T imagine!
Haha, I am 4 months post partum and I think I am still dealing with the stupid hormones. I am totally with you though… I am a complete nice person, but those hormones make me daydream about being the totally aggressive tell it like it is person. some days I wish I could actually get the guts to say some of the things I dream about saying. Some people just deserve it! Great blog! I hope you keep writing!
*giggle* I’m with you, some people do deserve it!!
So funny and so true! I am right there with you right now (seven months today) and so far I think I have kept most of the crazy to myself, but the thoughts that go through my head… All I can say is that my husband deserves a great big medal for putting up with me so well!
Thank you for sharing. It does make me feel just a little bit better 🙂
I guess as long as we keep the thoughts in our head in public we’regood, but my husband gets his fair share of muttering under my breath directed at him, LOL!
Unfortunately my crazy never stopped after the second 😉 people in the mall that refuse to get out of the way when you are clearly struggling with a giant two kid stroller and THEY are walking on the WRONG side of the walkway coming strait at you (often teenagers, though I’ve noticed even other parents). My other favorite is when I am toting the same giant stroller AND trying to open a door, all while someone is trying to sneak past me or expect me to hold the door for them! WTH!! Common courtesy has disappeared! I say you unleash 😉 love this post!
When did people get so rude? I can be carrying my son and I will still use a free hand to hold a door for someone with a stroller? Sheesh!
Girl I’ve been right there with you. I remember doing a yard sale and I was trying to be nice to everyone. This one woman comes up and totally saw through it. she said,” you don’t have to pretend. I was so evil during my pregnancy my husband stayed away from me and wouldn’t even let people come visit because he was scared I would be too rude.” Totally made me feel better. I wasn’t that BAD…LOL
I totally understand you! I am 6 months pregnant and I can hardly recognize myself. Yeah, I just finished crying a few moments ago because I have so much work to do and my father just asked to help with his website – I’m the only person who can do it and my daughter and I haven’t had dinner yet. It’s 7:30 pm! I’m starving and I’m so mad everyone needs my help and I have a huge event on my blog. Argh! And I found myself reading your post even though I have no time for it! 🙂
Ooh when I’m hungry I’m a bear! Hope you get a break soon!
LOVE the stories! haha Thanks for sharing. I, on the other hand, am basically completely normal while pregnant and get annoyed when other people’s husbands elbow mine and are like “just wait! She’s going to get crazy eventually!”
Post-pregnancy – totally another story – I was a complete basket case for a few weeks. =)
What we go through for babies! =)
It drove me crazy when people acted like I couldn’t do stuff while pregnant. I physically couldn’t bend down towards the end, but I can pick up a box thankyouverymuch. Though at 7 months pregnant, moving boxes unpacking & cleaning the floor 10,000 times (the builders supposedly had the house cleaned??) My hips were so shot I had to crawl to the bathroom at night. 🙁
Sorry all us crazy pregnant gals gave you a bad rep. 😉
Wow, can I relate to most of that! LOL! Hormones are wonderful and nasty all at the same time. I am generally happy when pregnant, but when I do get “moody” (I hate that word, esp when preg! Who isn’t moody when they’re carrying around an extra 20lbs in the heat and getting NO sleep?!), anyway, when I do get moody during pregnancy, it’s multiplied times a million I think.
Post-pregnancy hormones for me is just tears, tears and more tears. Worse than during pregnancy.
Hang in there and feel free to let go of that steam every once in a while! People need to be put in their place sometimes (although maybe a little gentler than ramming them with your cart! LOL), and you have the pregnancy as an excuse… =)
You lost me at “an extra 20 pounds.” Just kidding! I’m up 20 already and I have almost half the pregnancy to go, LOL. Have to add on the two year old I’m always carrying too. 😉
Funny though, I accidentally hit a lady with my cart once (pushing that GIANT car cart & trying to watch DS walking beside me- and “traffic” stopped suddenly.) I was MORTIFIED and apologized repeatedly and she just glared at me.
I do think you should be able to plead “pregnant” vs. “guilty” LOL.
Hahahaha, this is hilarious! (Although probably not to you!!) I’m sure the rage and the tears are NOT funny to you right now. My birthday was last week and I had to go to the DMV twice! (of course, because no matter how prepared I try to be, there will always be something I didn’t bring with me!! This time, my marriage certificate….) Anyway, then our laptop crashed on my birthday (with the videos of our son on it) and then JCPenney wouldn’t let me use a coupon for $10 0ff of a purchase of $25 when the skirt I wanted to buy was $24.99 and on and on and on. I had such a horrible week that every little thing that I normally would have brushed off was just making me more angry!! And I did cry. I’m also not a confrontational person, and so when I get upset, I just resort to crying because screaming at people isn’t in my nature. Anyway, Sorry for rambling but I sympathize because I know how hard it can be to shake things off. When I get angry or sad or regretful, or mistreated, etc. I have a really hard time getting over it! And that’s the worst part of all!
See, it is funny when I write about it. Kind of why I wanted to write about it. If I’m writing/laughing, I’m not commiting any crimes, see? 😉
I would have flipped after the computer crash I think. Hope you can recover the videos!
I totally hear you on this. Everything is worse during pregnancy. I feel blessed that I don’t suffer with much physical symptoms, but the emotional rollercoaster can be so trying! I love being pregnant, but I’m glad I’m more than half way done. I’m just waiting to see how many more “was it planned?” comments or other randomness because we’re so brazen as to have (and want) 3 children! I’m trying to work on my creative comebacks for dumb people – at least I can let a little bit of steam off with something clever.
Aah same here! We are having our third & already have a boy & a girl. Say something really crass relating to making said baby & watch ’em squirm. 😉
OMG It’s like I’m reading about myself. This is our 3rd pregnancy and it has been an emotional rollercoaster. Physical symptons? Never had them this pregnancy but the hormones..well thats another story. I’ve never snapped at my children (3 & 2 yrs of age) so much in our lives. Its ridiculous and yes I too have had the question of”was this planned” um yes my husband and I made a concious decision each & everytime to have our children, so please dont look at me like “oh boy are Congratulations in order” OF COURSE THEY ARE YOU NIMROD!!! I mean my husband and I both work our butts off to provide for our family so if “we” decide to expand it- well quite frankly its none of your business! I am not some drug addict, lazy, unemployed person who mooches off of other people or programs that are out there. Now please dont get me wrong the special programs out there like WIC or Welfare are wonderful programs when they are used how they are meant to be used – as a stepping stone and not a way of life. Anyways thanks for letting me vent.
People are SO RUDE! If someone asks you if the baby was planned, you should discuss charting your cycles and timing “trying” around ovulation…in detail. 😉
OMG…I am laughing so hard. You HAVE to write more of these. I am almost 6 wks pregnant and I chewed a co-worker out this morning. Irrational! I wasnt like this with my first pregnancy. Good to know I am not alone!!
I stopped working when I was pregnant due to a crappy work situation but I swear if I hadn’t quit I would have gotten fired! I had zero tolerance for all the dummies I had to work with, LOL!
Oh, I love you. It was like reading about my own pregnancy lol Bursting into tears at commercials, having to rush out of the grocery store to puke on the sidewalk, and taking random boughts of aggression out on whoever was close enough. My family was VERY understanding, they didn’t try to make me feel better, they just let me go with whatever insanity the day called for. And they say pregnancy is “beautiful”….
Beutiful my hiney. 😉
Me too! My husband said something very very vaguely morbid and I yelled at him and started crying!
I try to be a sweet, understanding person most of the time too. But pregnancy makes me different as well. And lately, even though I’m not pregnant, I feel like I’ve had enough of people’s rudeness, dangerous driving, and plain inconsideration for others. My biggest pet peeve is when people don’t mind my personal space. Didn’t their mother ever tell them not to bump into other people or to give them room to breathe? I totally get what you are feeling. That mother should have made it clear to her son that it was in no way okay to treat your children like that. Who raised her?!
OMG I totally forgot about the personal space issue! I am very petite and take up very little space, so people act like I’m not there! I could give a zillion examples of that, LOL. I got whacked in the head with a chair at the fireworks this year & while DD & I were in line for ice cream, we became the “door” for people to walk through no matter where we were standing. I guess from farther away we looked like a gap?
I know the feeling!! I get annoyed with everything while pregnant too! What is the WORST is when people (husbands, family, anyone around you) doesn’t acknowledge that you have pregnancy hormones & tries to make you think more rationally or feel bad for being annoyed. Great blog post! I would love to read more of your writing!
Yes! I wouldn’t mind if someone just chalked my irrational behavior up to pregnancy hormones. BUT if someone notices my PMS crazies and DARES suggest I might be getting my period, heads will roll. Hee-hee.
This post is SO me right now! I am pregnant with my third and I thought I’d kind of have it down pact right now but…Lord help me! But my situation is usually the opposite, people always brush my concerns off and ignore me because they think everything is pregnancy hormones…ugh that irks my nerves!
Pay no attention to the crazy pregnant lady in the corner! 😉
I just stumbled across your blog today, and I had to laugh at the mayo on the burger comment. When I was pregnant, I was quite sick for the first 3 months and I ate whatever sounded good. I really, really wanted Maple & Brown Sugar Malt O’ Meal, and when my hubby came home with maple & brown sugar oatmeal, I cried. Full blown, melt down crying! We have all been there!
It is the worst, ha ha!
I know it’s not something I should have, but I was craving a starbucks frozen mocha thingy the other day and had mentioned it to my husband. I guess at his job they all got some free starbucks the other day so he realized they were good. yesterday he came home with 2 mocha coffees from there, the hot kind. I wanted to cry so bad but he doesn’t take crying or hormones very well even though this is our 2nd pregnancy…Irrational wife.
You are not alone in this feeling. I was annoyed at everything while I was pregnant. I was kind of glad my husband was deployed for part of it. To save him from some of my irrational behavior. I also had crazy sleep habits. I’d sleep for 10 hours and still need a nap for like the 1st 4 months. It was crazy.
That’s what I miss most…when you’re pregnant the first time, you can nap!
I also forgot how poorly I sleep while pregnant. Weird dreams, itchy skin, trips to the bathroom…phooey. I know it will only get worse towards the end too!