I Swear I’m Not Avoiding Potty Training Just Because I Love Fluff

by Maria Moser on March 14, 2012

in Personal Posts,Potty Training

Since we use cloth diapers, blowing money on disposables isn’t a factor in my desire to potty train my almost 3 year old son. So my potty training “method” didn’t lead to quick training like it did with my daughter, but I still stand by it. I don’t think there’s a “one-size fits all” method for potty training, and I think when people swear that xyz had their child trained in a weekend, it was simply because the child was ready & the method was right for them & their personality.

My son isn’t exactly a potty loving genius. At the time I wrote that post, he was around 26 months old, and using the potty a few times a day. I was hopeful that by now, he’d be doing even better. He will be 3 in less than 2 1/2 months, and I’m starting to wonder if I will have to change his diaper at the prom. When my daughter was his age, she was completely potty trained. I just registered him for pre-school, but I’m not sure if he will be able to go in the fall, since children have to be potty trained to attend.

I know he’s just not ready. He’s just not. The more I push, the more he’ll push back, and so I wait. We’ve tried to encourage him; I always cheer him on and tell him how proud I am when he uses the potty, suggest he use the potty and so forth. He has some very cool Mickey & cars underwear and although the last thing we need is another potty or potty seat, we took him to pick out his own, hoping that might motivate him. Nuh-uh.

My husband isn’t as patient. He tried bribing my son with candy (his favorite), offering a tootsie roll for pee & a tootsie pop for poop. He went so far as to tell him he’d make cupcakes if he just tried his underwear on. No go. Not that I blame him, my hubby isn’t exactly a baker, LOL.

What he will do is squeeze out a tiny tinkle in order to get a tootsie roll every few days, or to stall at bedtime. It’s quite possible that I just haven’t found the right motivator, but I think he’s just not ready.

Not only has a pair of underwear never touched his bottom (which makes me sad because they are so darn cute!!) but he won’t even wear trainers. We showed him that they were just like diapers, only pulled up and down, but he wants no part of it. For several months, he’s gotten very particular about his favorite diapers, and doesn’t want to wear any new ones. When I’ve had a new one to review, I have to agree to take it right back off just to get him to let me take pictures! (The Tots Bots Easy fit was the first one he agreed to wear for a while, but who in their right mind would want to take off something lined with soft minky??)

I can hear someone now saying that it shouldn’t be his choice, that I should just tell him this is how it’s going to be and that’s that. While that may be true for that person’s child, every child is different, and it wouldn’t work for my son at this point (though it does work some some things!)

In any case, I still think he will train when he’s ready, and when I find the right motivation for him. I think my husband will go on poopy diaper strike soon though. My son has started to say “euuucch! ‘ats ‘is-gusting!” when I open a stinky diaper, since he’s heard my husband say it so often, LOL. He likes his diapers and does not agree that diapers are only for babies, since his baby brother has little diapers, and he has big diapers!

If he hasn’t potty trained by the time preschool starts in the fall, he won’t be able to go. I think that once he’s ready, we’ll have to take the approach of simply quitting diapers “cold turkey.” He’s definitely not ready for that yet; I tried to get him to just run around bottomless but he wasn’t interested. I just need to make sure I keep trying, and find the right moment to take the diapers away.

Is it pathetic that my biggest worry is that other people will think I’m a terrible/lazy mom for having a 3 year old that’s still in diapers?


{ 6 comments… read them below or add one }

1 Jill March 14, 2012 at 3:52 pm

summer would be a PERFECT time for cold turkey, not too cold so a bare or just undies butt wouldn’t be a big issue, plus playing outside would be the perfect ‘catch’ time for #1s– esp. if you have a portable seat. he can drink all he wants and then he’ll ‘go go go’ so to speak! just a thought!

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2 Maria March 14, 2012 at 3:58 pm

He will scream for a diaper. With some things, you can ignore & act neutral & he will get over it eventually, but he just screams & screams if you try to leave him out of a diaper. Weird since you’d think he would like it!!

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3 Hannah VW March 14, 2012 at 5:56 pm

All very true! I think kids to through “phases” where they are more/less ready due to age, personality, gender, other things going on in their lives. If you miss one opportunity (like, if your child seems interested but you’re busy with a newborn or something), then there will be another one. There is no one-size-fits-all method or age to do it. I do think it’s good to be consistent (aka, if you offer the potty after naps, do it EVERY DAY after naps, etc.) but other than that, whatever works!

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4 Maria March 14, 2012 at 6:03 pm

I wish he’d take naps, LOL! Yes you are right, I haven’t been very consistent since the baby was born and I knew it would be that way. :-)

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5 Anastasia @ eco-babyz March 15, 2012 at 11:32 am

You’re a great mom and I would never judge you for having a 3 year old who isn’t potty trained!

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6 C Hulsey March 16, 2012 at 4:20 am

You are not terrible or lazy. Whatever works for you and your child is what works for you and your child. Feel free to read my potty post that went live tonight. http://allthingszoo.blogspot.com/2012/03/potty-training-its-for-birds.html

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